I am Kyle's self-indulgence

Erika is volunteering at a local church's food pantry tonight, so I fed the kids dinner, bathed them, and put them to bed. As I was saying goodnight to Daniel, he said he wanted Erika to come and say goodnight (as he says every night when she is here). I told him that she is still at the food pantry, but if she comes home while Daniel is still awake I will have her come in and say goodnight.

"You know what's the best thing?" Daniel asked.

I replied, "What?"

"When I go to sleep and wake up, and then Mommy comes in."

There are a lot of things to love about our local TV station's news website: the spelling and grammar mistakes, the charmingly mundane stories, and the aneurism-inducing reader comments.

But my favorite is the News RoundUp. This regular feature highlights and summarizes the most newsworthy items of the day. The thing is, though, that the writers feel the need to capture the essence of each story in just a few words, and then to combine the three, separated by commas, within the headline. Usually this results in something like, RoundUp: Iowans and credit, Rathbun Lake tour & health care. But occasionally the news items are worded in such a way that their juxtaposition results in some unintended meaning. These are always a delightful surprise.

Here are a few of my favorites:

Proving you're a citizen, forgery & a new high school
With a couple of punctuation changes, this could be the title of a fantastic weekend seminar.

Worker accused of having sex, yoga & Tasers
I'd like to know what kind of job that worker was hired to do.

Ignoring laws, lightning causes house fire & shorter school year
Something must be done about this lightning's utter disregard for our society's laws and our school schedule.

Tom the Dancing Bug illustrates an important point:

I heard this story the yesterday about some Republicans who want to remove the part of the 14th amendment that automatically allows anyone born within the United States to be a citizen.

I thought that conservatives are committed to preserving the constitution (or at least what they imagine the constitution to say). Apparently, that only applies to the parts of the constitution that agree with their agenda.

As usual, the debate seems to center around what congress intended when adopting the amendment. So just to clarify, when legislators wrote 219 years ago that "A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the People to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed," they clearly meant that private citizens should be able to own and operate assault rifles and machine guns in 2010, but when they wrote 144 years ago that "All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside," they clearly did not intend to include Mexicans.

Got it?

One of my favorite things about All Songs Considered is their coverage of the big music festivals each year, especially the Newport Folk Festival. It will be a long time before I can actually attend (if ever), but I can experience the concerts vicariously through NPR’s comprehensive coverage: I believe audio recordings for all the performances are available through the Live Concerts podcast and I’ve spent the last week listening to them straight through.

There’s a great show by Punch Brothers, a band I would love to see live. While I couldn’t find a video of them playing “Rye Whiskey,” a favorite of mine, at Newport, here they are gettin' down on another occasion:

They also closed their set with an odd cover of Radiohead’s “Kid A.”

A band I’ve just learned about through these live recordings is O’Death. Here they are performing “Grey Sun” at Newport:

They fit into that wildly-aggressive-playing-of-traditional-insruments genre that I love. Just watch that guy go to town on the violin at the end. I’m definitely going to be checking them out some more.

My most exciting discovery, though, was John Prine, who apparently is a very famous and renowned folk artist that nobody bothered telling me about until now (I’m disappointed in you, Internet). He sings a song (also apparently famous) titled, “Your Flag Decal Won’t Get You Into Heaven Anymore.” There is a YouTube video of him performing it at Newport here, but the quality isn’t very good, so here's an almost completely unrelated performance from several years ago:

When I heard this, I assumed it was a fairly recent song, probably written during the height of the Iraq War, considering its message about religion and shallow patriotism. It turns out, though, that it dates all the way back to 1971. It’s interesting how such a specific satirical song can be so timeless. Again, something I’m going to have to check out more of.

I was intrigued to learn today about Republican congressman Bob Inglis, who recently lost a primary election largely because he refuses to pander to the Tea Party paranoia that has swept through his constituents. Among his crimes: telling people to "turn Glenn Beck off," criticizing Joe Wilson for yelling at the President during a State of the Union address, and refusing to call Barack Obama a Socialist.

Upon reading these things, my first reaction was relief at hearing about a Republican politician who actually seems decent, followed by depression at the thought that the bar for Republicans is so low that all someone has to do to stand out is not call the President a Socialist.

I don't want to make little of Inglis's integrity, though. There are some comments he made in the Mother Jones interview that really did impress me. Here he is talking about why he wouldn't call Obama a Socialist:

The word is designed to have emotional charge to it. Throughout my primary, there were people insisting that I use the word. They would ask me if he was a socialist, and I would always find some other word. I'd say, "President Obama wants a very large government that I don't think will work and that spends too much and it's inefficient and it compromises freedom and it's not the way we want to go." They would listen for the word, wait to see if I used the s-word, and when I didn't, you could see the disappointment.

I refused to use the word because I have this view that the Ninth Commandment must mean something. I remember one year Bill Clinton—the guy I was out to get [when serving on the House judiciary committee in the 1990s]—at the National Prayer Breakfast said something that was one of the most profound things I've ever heard from anybody at a gathering like that. He said, "The most violated commandment in Washington, DC"—everybody leaned in; do tell, Mr. President—"is, 'Thou shall not bear false witness against thy neighbor.'" I thought, "He's right. That is the most violated commandment in Washington." For me to go around saying that Barack Obama is a socialist is a violation of the Ninth Commandment. He is a liberal fellow. I'm conservative. We disagree...But I don't need to call him a socialist, and I hurt the country by doing so. The country has to come together to find a solution to these challenges or else we go over the cliff.

I have never wanted to be the type of person to vote solely on party lines, but after seeing the Republican Party as a bloc perpetuate misinformation and outright lies about Obama's health care and tax policies, and tolerate the worst elements of their own party, I thought I had finally reached a point at which I would never support any Republican ever, purely on principle. But after seeing Inglis's integrity, I think that maybe I could support him. Maybe.

So I just found out this exists, from Neil Gaiman's blog, of all places (apparently they are engaged to be married).

I briefly considered getting it, waffled, and decided to save my money until I saw that she's charging 84 cents to download the entire album. How could I pass that up?

Actually, it looks like you can pay more if you like, but $0.84 is the minumum amount. I thought I'd be generous and chip in two bucks.

Daniel has never been much of a music fan. From the time he could talk, he would respond to Erika’s and my singing with, “No, no no.” When he got older and more articulate he elaborated with “I don’t like your song.” This went for children’s music we were actively trying to get him to learn or just music that I play in the background when we’re at home.

This was disappointing to me because I listen to music all the time. I love seeking out new artists that are original and exciting, and one of the things I’ve looked forward to with having kids is enjoying music with them. I have secretly dreamed of the day when Daniel or Eva would come to love something utterly cool like The Flaming Lips or Sufjan Stevens.

That day finally came this past spring.

I had just downloaded the latest Micah P. Hinson album and was listening to it for the first time on the way to school. From the backseat Daniel said, “I like this song.” Sometime later we were at home and I was playing the same album. Daniel again declared, “I like this song,” and added, “What song is this?” The title was “Seven Horses Seen Or Through The Hours, Still Comes Another Day” -- a particularly cumbersome title for a four-year-old, so I shortened it to just Seven Horses Seen.

From that day afterward, anytime I began playing my iPod Daniel said, "I want Seven Horses Seen." Sometimes I told him I wanted to hear something else, but sometimes I would relent. And as we listened to it repeatedly I realized that this really is a great song--perhaps the best on the album. It begins with slow, mournful strings, and features a captivating melody sung in Hinson’s gruff baritone.

At this point I need to explain that I am not a lyrics guy. When I listen to music I pay attention to the melody, instrumentation, and other sound features, and really pay little attention to the actual words being sung. On more than one occasion I have embarrassed myself by declaring, “This is such a nice song,” only to have Erika give me a weird look and say, “You know it’s about suicide, right?”

I say this because I had already listened to Seven Horses Seen a number of times with Daniel before I decided that maybe I should pay attention to the words and make sure it’s appropriate for him. As luck would have it, the very first lines of the song are, “Hey little boy, don’t you be afraid. Your father doesn’t love you and he's made your mom a maid.” After that it gets even more depressing.

By this time, though, Daniel had already established that this is his favorite song, the only song he requests by name, and, like I said, it’s a pretty great song. Besides, it might be that Daniel didn’t pay attention to the words any more than I did. He may like the sound of it, but have no idea about its depressing message.

We were driving to my mom’s house for the 4th July. Daniel was getting impatient on the home stretch, so I decided to turn on Seven Horses Seen for him. After first few bars, Daniel pointed out to us, “He says, ‘Your father doesn’t love you.’” Erika shot me a look. “So much for him not listening to the lyrics, huh?” To make things worse, when we got to my mom’s house he repeated the line for her as well, and a few more times over the weekend.

So I decided then that we’re just going to have to be done with that song. More significantly, I think this marks a big change in the way we listen to music in our house. Up to this point I’ve felt free to play pretty much whatever I want. Sure, I stay away from things that are obviously inappropriate like Outkast or Ween, but pretty much everything else I’ve been able to play around the house without any consideration of the lyrical content. Now, though, when I listen to music I’m going to have to be much more conscious of the words being sung and make decisions about whether or not that’s the kind of thing I want to hear coming out of my children’s mouths.

I think this is the best-kept secret at Omaha's Henry-Doorly Zoo. The Garden of Senses is tucked toward the back of the zoo and doesn't get many visitors, but the last two times we've gone, Daniel has gotten a big kick out of seeing the parrots and hearing them talk. This last time was particularly fun.

Like I mentioned last week, I loved the recording of INXS's Kick that Beck did with his indie rock friends. It was a little bit surprising when announced because the first three Record Club installments were classic albums very much in a proto-indie rock and folk vein, but I thought the musical collective's rendition of some top-level 80s pop worked very well. It also left me very curious about what's next.

If Kick was a slightly unexpected turn, the new album comes way out of left field. It is Yanni Live at the Acropolis. Here's what Beck.com has to say about it:

To flesh out and capture the complex arrangements, several studio musician heavyweights were brought in to read a heavily doctored score with interpolations of everything from Stravinsky to Shania Twain (look for others). Beck and Thurston Moore from Sonic Youth provided auxiliary music and noise, with Thurston improvising lyrics over the previously instrumental track ‘Santorini.’ The new lyrics give the track an added urgency and pathos. Tortoise show up later on a few other tracks.

This is going to be weird.

This week I’m getting to have a little taste of what it’s like to be a single parent. Erika is away in Florida, attending her sorority’s national convention, so from Wednesday afternoon through late Sunday night I’m flying solo.

There have been a few moments of frustration, mostly when the kids are in the house running around and fighting over toys, but we’ve had enough excuses to get out for church or a friend’s birthday party that I’ve been able to maintain my sanity.

Today it was 95 degrees outside, so I decided it was time to set up our big wading pool. From the moment the kids got up from their nap and “rest time,” respectively, we were outside swimming and splashing and having a great time.

Eventually, though, we had to go back inside so I could make dinner while dealing with one child further breaking a door screen, bending venetian blinds, and closing his sister’s fingers in the lid of a storage box (seconds after I had said to leave the box closed). I’m afraid I lost my cool at this point, and later had to have a talk with said child about how daddy is sorry for yelling and he’s going to try to not do that anymore, but that he really needs the child to listen and do as he’s told.

But then, after an unusually calm bathtime I read to Eva Neil Gaiman’s Blueberry Girl, which I have decided is now officially our Special Book, kissed her goodnight, and was greeted by Daniel, dressed in his pajamas, and ready to read Neil Gaiman’s Odd and the Frost Giants (Yes I have a thing for Gaiman, but these are two excellent children’s books, okay?). Since Eva and daddy have a special book, I told Daniel that this can be a Special Book just for us guys.

After not napping and spending all afternoon playing in the pool, Daniel was very tired and didn’t quite make it to the end of our chapter. After watching him sleep peacefully for a minute, I turned out the light. While slowly and quietly pulling his door closed I decided that these are the moments that keep me going.

Yesterday Beck.com wrapped up the latest Record Club installment. This time Beck and friends covered Kick by INXS. I've been waiting for it to be finished so I can download the bootleg audio rips and listen to it as an album, so I've only now heard most of these recordings.

My reaction: Wow. I think this is the best Record Club session yet. I don't know if they spent more time trying out arrangements and rehearshing beforehand, but it certainly sounds that way. They really breathe some fresh life into these classic 80s tracks. Here are my two new favorites.

Yesterday I saw my home of Fremont, Nebraska on the national news, though for a not-so-auspicious reason. They recently passed a law that would prohibit local businesses from hiring, and local landlords from renting to, illegal immigrants. Like the recent Arizona law, it unconstitutionally gives local governments the power to enforce federal law and make life more difficult for illegal immigrants already living in the US. Even if you have no problem with the immigration side of it, though, such legislation is an open invitation for racial profiling. After all, how many white people do you think will be called upon to prove their citizenship?

The racial element of this immigration debate was revealed to me in a particularly ironic way recently. The town I live in now doesn’t have the Hispanic population that Fremont has, and in my four years teaching at this school I have known of only one student who was in America illegally. But she was never the subject of ridicule or persecution. Nobody is going to demand to see her proof of citizenship. Nobody is passing laws to keep her from renting an apartment. Why? Because she had immigrated illegally from Canada.

Embedded in the debate over illegal immigration there is a very basic assumption that mostly goes unspoken, but must be acknowledged: People in America do not have a problem with illegal immigrants: they have a problem with illegal Hispanics immigrants. And no matter how many times people insist that they are just wanting to enforce the laws on the books, the underlying truth is that what they are tyring to do is keep illegal Hispanic immigrants out of America. And as long as that is true, any strict enforcement of immigration law in Fremont or in Arizona is just going to lead to Hispanic-Americans being stopped on the street, Hispanic-Americans being accused of coming her illegally, and Hispanic-Americans being asked to prove their citizenship just to find a place to live.

My favorite part? The Nina Totenberg opening, naturally.

On a side note, it's always strange to see NPR personalities' faces while they speak. I know that's Robert Siegel's voice, but I don't understand why it's coming out of that strange man's mouth.

The circus came to town today, and we decided it would be fun to take the kids. I haven't been to the circus since I was very little, and I believe I was sick on the one occasion, so my memory of it is fuzzy, so my concept of a circus is based mostly on what I've seen on TV: the big, elaborate Ringling Bros-style shows.

When we walked through the the doors of the indoor pavilion at the county fairground, I was surprised at how small everything was. There was one ring in the center with four-tiered wooden bleachers on three sides, some room on the ground for kids to sit, and an area for concessions and souvenirs. It occurred to me, though, that this is probably more along the lines of what circuses have traditionally been: small-scale circus families, travelling from small town to small town by caravan.

I found myself enchanted by all the classic circus cliches: the ringmaster with his BIG, DRAMATIC VOICE; the hard, creaky wooden bleachers; the little bags of peanuts (with the shells still on). All of the standard circus acts were present: the lion and tiger trainer, acrobats, elephants, jugglers, Argentinian Gauchos, camels, and a canine RE-vue.

And then there was the most sacred of all circus traditions: the commitment to making a buck in any way possible. Between every act the ringleader was loudly hocking light-up toys, souvenir whips, authentic circus peanuts, elephant rides, photos with the elephants, balloons, and coloring books. At the end of each pitch he would declare, "Just FIVE DOLLARS! If you want one, RAISE YOUR HAND!" at which 100 little hands would shoot into the air.

I loved it. I loved the genuine self-promotion of it. I loved the unironic tackiness of it all. I even loved the shameless pushing of overpriced crap. I loved it because I think this is what travelling circuses have always been: a wild way to bring some rare entertainment to a small town and part the residents from as much of their money as possible in the process.

What I've neglected to mention so far, though, is that it really was a good show. The lions and tigers (some of them white lions and tigers) were very impressive to see parading around, performing tricks, and all that. The acrobats performed cool feats made even more impressive by their ages: most of them seemed to be the children of the men and women running the circus. One girl kept 55 hula hoops in motion, which is much more amazing when you see her do it and realize that the combined size of all 55 hoops is probably larger than the 12-year-old herself.

There was such a variety of talent and exotic animals that I began to wonder how they manage to make a living playing to such small crowds. Even with most of them performing multiple jobs and even the ringleader grabbing a bunch of balloons or an armload of whips to sell during the intermission, I just don't see how they earn enough money in a show to cover expenses.

I'm glad that there are still people doing this though: raising a family of circus performers, taking their show from town to town, bringing some excitement and wonder everywhere they go.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the greatest flash game in the history of the Internet: Super Mario Crossover.

In this game, you can work your way through the levels of Super Mario Bros. with the heroes from a variety of classic Nintendo games.

Each character has his own attack abilities. You can shoot bad guys with Bill. You can stun and stab with Link. Furthermore, powerups like mushrooms and flowers bestow on the characters the ability upgrades they receive in their own games.

How awesome!

This weekend I saw The Flaming Lips in concert with my friend Danny. Although they've been one of my favorite bands for years, I haven't actually seen them in concert since 2000. Since then they've developed the kind of wild, celebratory concert performance that has earned them a very strong fan following. While I've seen and read all about their antics, I learned that experiencing it all firsthand is another thing entirely.

After the band took the stage in a bizarre sequence that involved them emerging from the birth canal of the woman projected on-screen behind them (don't ask), Wayne Coyne rolled his space bubble out over the crowd and then returned to stage for the opening number of "Worm Mountain," which just happens to be my favorite song from the new album and the reason I wanted to see them on this tour. The band exploded with the insanely drum- and bass-laden song, lights flashed, smoke and confetti poured out of cannons, giant balloons bounced overhead, and I was in ecstasy. It seemed like the band was unleashing everything in their spectacular repertoire in just the first song. I really felt like I could leave satisfied after that: I had already seen everything I had come for.

(That's not my video, by the way. My thanks and apologies to the fan who uploaded it)

The concert continued with more confetti, balloons, and now a couple of weird inflatable animals on stage. After several more songs things toned down a bit and Wayne took up his bubble-encased acoustic guitar to play a few solo songs, starting with the traditional "She Don't Use Jelly" (he stopped and restarted midway through because the crowd's rhythmic clapping was throwing him off), an "I Can Be A Frog" sing-along, and "Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots Part 1." It was nice to see Wayne actually playing some instruments again: in recent years fans began speculating that Wayne doesn't even know how to play guitar because he seemed to only use it as a prop onstage. But his guitar abilities are just fine. Later, he even manned the solo on Powerless (I always assumed that would Stephen's part live).

The Lips closed out their main set with the full band, then came back for the first encore with Stardeath and White Dwarfs for the epic Brain Damage/Eclipse from Dark Side of the Moon. It was a deafening performance with two bands on stage pounding away and the whole crowd wailing along at the tops of their lungs. It would seem like a tough song to top.

The best moment for me, though, was the second encore, when the band came back for "Do You Realize??" As he is wont to do, Wayne preceded the song with some rambling stage chatter. Normally I think he overexplains the songs a bit, but here he talked about a young man that was on tour with them who lost his father recently. At the funeral, he said, they played this song. Wayne talked about how the song addresses death, but is really about embracing life and appreciating our loved ones while they're here. He encouraged the crowd to celebrate in the song on behalf of those in the audience for whom the song may conjure up more somber associations.

Then the song began, and although I've heard it at least 50 times in the last eight years, I experienced the full weight of the song like never before. And when it got the line, "Do you realize that happiness makes you cry?" for the very first time ever the words caused genuine tears of joy to well up in my eyes. It sounds cheesy, but in that moment, surrounded by singing fans and awash in lights and streams of confetti, I felt connected with everyone in the amphitheater that night. But that's just what The Flaming Lips do: through their unself-conscious cheesiness, optimism, and love for spectacle, they give people a communal concert experience that they will never forget.

Sometime around Christmas, I think, we started talking to Daniel about rhyming words. He was interested in the idea, but he really just didn't get it for a long time. That didn't stop him from trying, though. Daniel would frequently come up to us, say, "I have a rhyme!" and then utter two words that in no way resembled each other, like train airplane, bike bathtub, or ceiling pineapple. Each time we had to tell him that no, those words don't rhyme. He showed an undaunted spirit, though, and continually came back to us with, "I have another rhyme!"

With the help of a new game, Daniel moved on to repeating stock rhyming words that we had told him, like dog frog, man fan, etc. When prompted to make his own, though, he still came back to pairs like animal dinosaur.

Then one day he told me, "I have a new rhyme! Boat moat! I was pretty sure no book or game we had contained moat in it, and I praised him for his original rhyme. Since then he's been dazzling us with his rhyming skills. The way I know he's really got the concept is that he's started producing nonsense words with rhyming sounds. Just today he's excitedly informed me that piggy wiggy, train fain, and boing foing are all rhyming pairs.

Now if only they'd include the beaks and feet.

(Picture taken outside the Kirksville KFC)

There's no way to know what Charles Shulz was thinking when he made this strip in 1963, but it's such a perfect metaphor for the health care debate that if someone made this same joke today there would be no doubt about its intended meaning.

But then, the debate over government-paid health care plans goes back decades, so who knows? Maybe Shulz really did embed a commentary on the paranoia of anti-Socialism in Peanuts.

In my Google Reader rss feeds I saw the Onion headline, "Virginia Governor Declares April Confederate History Month." I thought, "Ha ha, good one, Onion!" and clicked on the link, only to discover that this is not a fake article, but one of their American Voices pieces in which their fictional people-on-the-street make snarky comments about real world news items. Apparently, it's not only real, but has existed for several years.

As you may know, Beck has been involved with a project called Record Club, in which he and various guest musicians cover a classic album in one day. The first three selections were more or less what I'd expect from the genre-bending folk rocker, but I was surprised to learn that the fourth album (recorded with members of Liars, St. Vincent, and Os Mutantes) is Kick by INXS. I don't have any particular complaints against the album, but it's definitely not what I generally associate with Beck.

The first two tracks are up on Beck.com, and while the first is pretty straightforward and faithful version of "Guns In The Sky," Beck and Friends' reinterpretation of "New Sensation" is really something else entirely.

Why did nobody tell me about this before now? Axe Cop is the most amazingly hilarious webcomic I have ever read.

Axe Cop, written by Malachai Nicolle (age 6) and illustrated by Ethan Nicolle (age 29), follows the adventures of an axe-wielding cop, his partner Avocado Soldier (formerly Dinosaur Solder, formerly Flute Cop), and a host of characters so insane they could only come from the imagination of a 6-year-old boy (he was 5 when the series started).

Just how awesome is this comic? Eight words: Vampire Werewolf Shark Wizard Ninja From The Moon.

There's also a section called Ask Axe Cop in which Axe Cop answers reader questions like, "If dirty apes took over the world, what would you do to stop them?" This section may be even funnier than the main comic.

Since I don't watch basketball (or any sporting events, really) I have to get my bracket fun from the Name of the Year competition. This year's bracket was released today, and I immediately filled it out.

Out this year for me: any name that just combines the names of famous people, like Napoleon Einstein or Aristotle Socrates. My one exception is Hitler Makofane, first of all because the two names make absolutely no sense together, and second because you would have to be insane to name your child (or change your own name to) Hitler, and somebody deserves recognition for that.

Other notables:

Typhoon Nurse: sounds like an amazing superheroine

Dick Smallberries, Jr: Normally I shy away from such obviously lowbrow humor, but it does amuse me that Dick Smallberries, Sr. wanted to pass his name on to his son.

Nohjay Nimpson: First I thought it said Nohjay Simpson, which is a little too obvious, but then I noticed it's Nimpson, which makes it much funnier.

Starzanne Stipes: Similar reaction: I initially read Stripes, and rolled my eyes. But Stipes? Better.

Foxy Foxworth: I'm a sucker for repetition.

Dr. Festus Dada: Any unusual name is made even better by putting Dr. in front of it. I love to imagine his name on the door to a fancy doctor's office.

X'zavier Bloodsaw: As soon as I saw this name I knew it was going to be the winner. Do I really need to explain why? If you don't already appreciate the greatness of this name then I'm afraid I can't help you.

You can click on the picture above to see my entire bracket, but here are my final four picks:
X'zavier Bloodsaw
Dick Smallberries, Jr.
Selathious Bobo (could he be this year's Barkevious Mingo?)
Dr. Festus Dada

And I predict the winner will be, naturally, X'zavier Bloodsaw. Every time I see that name it makes me smile.