Musings of a Punk Rock Father

Can you think of anything more ridiculous, unnecessary and impossible than creating a list of the top ten albums of all time? I have thought about this on and off for a few years, but have always come to the conclusion that the task was so overwhelmingly ambitious, and I have probably not heard enough albums, that I would be unable to create a truly comprehensive list. Even so, I have persevered past those initial doubts, at least to the point that I have come up with albums to fill the top five spots.

What are the criteria, then, to decide which albums pass muster? How to choose between a particular band’s second and third albums, if both are examples of artistic genius? I suppose a lot of it comes down to gut instinct, and, dang it, subjectivity. If album “A” is great but reminds me of the time I got sick at Taco Bell and spent the evening with my head in a toilet bowl and album “B” is great but reminds me of falling in love with my wife, I may be more likely to vote for album “B”.

I also must point out that I just enjoy punk rock more than any other genre. I listen to some other styles, but it hardly veers from rock n’ roll. I love blues, but to me that genre has more in common with punk rock than it has differences. Unfortunately, almost all of the blues I own is on “best of” sets and anthologies, so I am criminally unaware of a single blues album that I could put on this list. I also enjoy classical music, but Mahler never really released an “album,” so his 3rd symphony isn’t up for inclusion.

With that introduction out of the way, I present to you the first five albums in my top 10 albums of all time, starting with number five.

Anyone who knows me knows how much I love Project 86, so it should come as no surprise that they manage to crack number five on my top ten list. I first became aware of them sometime after their debut eponymous album came out, and a friend gave me a compilation with the song “Pipedream.” The song didn’t really do much for me, because it reminded me too much of Rage Against the Machine and other hard rock outfits that populated alternative radio at the time. I was much more into garage rock and “budget rock”, with most of my money going to Rip Off Records and Estrus Records bands. But for some reason I gave Project’s second outing, Drawing Black Lines, a chance, and to quote the band, “I’ll never look back.” Drawing Black Lines is a dynamic hard rock album that manages to be intense and intimate, universal and uniquely personal, catchy and completely original, all at the same time. This is an album that continues to be dogged with the nu-metal tag that is so much more than metal, and so much more than post-hardcore. The lyrical catharsis of songs like Me Against Me, and the spiritual thought behind “A Toast to My Former Self” are the tip of the iceberg for this album. I could write essay upon essay about Project 86 and their music. While I want to stress how important this album is, I hate to be like the many fans who accuse the band of peaking with their second album. I think their fourth and fifth records, “Songs to Burn Your Bridges By” and “…And the Rest Will Follow” are in many superior to this early effort, but both have songs that I could probably live without (“Circuitry” on the former, “From December” on the latter). Drawing Black Lines is brilliant, front to back.

Number four on my list brings us to not only my favorite style of music, but also my favorite band of all time. The New Bomb Turks are a punk rock band that defies the punk rock tag. I often describe them as a sped-up Rolling Stones. Their finest album can be found in 1996’s Scared Straight, the band’s third release. While their first two albums are classic punk rock staples courtesy of Crypt Records, the third record builds on the strengths of those two and goes beyond. The band introduces horn and piano, and employs a slightly slicker sound. I enjoy the clever lyrics of vocalist Eric Davidson, and since the band was made up of English majors I felt a certain kinship to them. As with Project 86, even though I chose the New Bomb Turks’ third album for this list, that is not to say that their later albums were any less incredible. In fact, their sixth and final proper record, “The Night Before the Day the Earth Stood Still” could actually be their finest album, but Scared Straight holds a special place in my punk rock heart.

I will shake things up a little bit with number three. Public Enemy brought a punk rock aesthetic to hip-hop and rap, and Apocalypse ’91…The Enemy Strikes Black, showcases their punk rock attitude better than many punk rock bands. This record contains so many now-classic rap anthems, from “Nighttrain” and “Can’t Truss It” to “By the Time I Get to Arizona” and Shut ‘Em Down” that it would be neglectful not to include it. Flavor Flav is the rhythm guitar to Chuck D’s lead, and Chuck’s booming voice imparts his lyrics with an immediacy that can’t be heard in the lazy drawl of any modern day, mainstream rapper. I felt like such a rebel listening to Public Enemy combine efforts with Anthrax for the re-recorded “Bring the Noise” and I still get excited over this record. Actually, the first show I ever saw when we finally got cable where I lived was “Yo MTV Raps,” and I vividly remember the video for “Bring the Noise,” which I saw before I even became a metal fan. So in a sense, Public Enemy could be credited with introducing me to heavy metal via Anthrax.

I keep going back and forth over the number one and two spots. Upon further reflection, I will award the number two spot to Iggy and the Stooger for their incendiary third and final album, Raw Power. This fiery sonic adventure filled with sweat, spit and blood was dismissed by virtually everyone when it was originally released. Many claimed that David Bowie’s production wrecked the album, but even with uneven mix Raw Power inspired bands all over the world. The band was volatile, and so were its records, and that volatility gave the records a sense of immediacy that defined punk rock in the early 70’s. A re-release of Raw Power in the late 90’s uncovered portions of the songs lost in the 1973 mix, and a more complex recording emerged from the ashes of raging punk masterpiece. “Gimme Danger,” “Raw Power,” “Search and Destroy”…these are songs that create legends and will live forever.

We need a drum roll for my number one album of all time…

Walk Among Us by the Misfits. This album is absolute perfection. All of the horror movie-inspired lyrics are entwined in some of the catchiest melodies you’ve ever heard. Glenn Danzig crafted incredibly concise, spectacularly bombastic songs, and there is no better collection of his songs than on this 1982 release. All of the choruses are great sing-along anthems, from “Twenty eyes in my head” to “I turned into a martian / I can’t even recall my name” to “This ain’t no love in / This ain’t no happenin’ / This ain’t no feelin’ in my arm” to “Brains for dinner, brains for lunch / Brains for breakfast, brains for brunch.” These songs become indelibly imprinted in your brain. Danzig had a talent, at least for the Misfits, for writing horror related songs that mostly refrained from going over the edge of poor taste, although the JFK-inspired “Bullet” from the “Static Age” album comes to mind as a notable exception. Mostly tongue-in-cheek, and mostly synopses of horror movies like “The Fly” and “Night of the Living Dead” or about horror movie actors like “Plan 9 From Outer Space” star Vampira, the songs on Walk Among Us stay more or less away from offensive material.

I love all of the pre-“Earth A.D.” Misfits material (I just never could get into their attempt at hardcore, although I listen occasionally; and I refuse to acknowledge the existence of the Misfits that Jerry Only started up without Danzig), but none of the other records can compare to the ferocious, melodic mayhem of Walk Among Us.

This list begs the question: what are your top 5 or 10 albums of all time? I'll continue to ponder to figure out what 6-10 are, and I would love to hear how badly you disagree with me.